Risk

Some of you were jesting about hearing voices in your heads; and yet this is the goal of every mortal being, to become fully conscious of the voice of their leading Adjustor, their precious God Fragment. Put away your fear! Put away your fear and trust that when you turn over to God you will not be lead astray. I'm not advocating foolish, intemperate rejection of intellect or logic; I'm not advocating insanity. But too much is being said that draws upon your deep fears that somehow or other when you reach out to God. He will deceive you, His hands will be removed, and you will fall, crash and burn. The leap of faith is never met with this kind of disappointment.

Let me start by saying, 'nothing risked, nothing learned.' This is a variant on, 'nothing risked, nothing gained,' with the emphasis in such a way as to take it out of the context of the business world, although its
truth there is often apparent. Consider the opposite of risk, a life where there are no dangers available to a person because they are unwilling to take risks. What would such a life be like?

Robert: Life without risk is the same as life without stress. We must have stress to live. Without stress, our systems will stagnate and die. Without risk, we stagnate and die, emotionally, spiritually. We block things up. We lock things up. And they change in negative, not in positive ways. Risk is growth. Risk is learning.  Risk is striving to be what we are destined to be by our indwelling monitor. Without risk, without learning, there is nothing.

Bob: I have two views of this. One side of me says, 'wouldn't it be wonderful to have a life with no stress! I'd like to try this sometime because it sounds great.' I'm not sure what side of me is saying that. But intellectually I've become convinced, with what Robert is saying, that it's absolutely crucial and it probably shows my ignorance to say it's taken me a such long time to say that, but it's clear to me now that nothing ventured, nothing gained, in spite of what one side of me wants to do.

Angie: On the other hand, Daniel, if you didn't take any risks would life be safe and secure?

Virginia: I think that any time one is in a relationship with another person, with an animal, with maybe life itself, I'm not sure, you are at risk, period! I think even the hermit would be at risk with material things and physical things, but I think the greatest risk is trying to be in relationship, honest relationship, open relationship with the people we come in contact. I think that's where you grow, that's where you learn, and
sometimes I think that it would be much easier to throw away a relationship, than to work through it and to keep that relationship going. That's risk to me.

Daniel: Virginia, can you say a word about what a life without risk would be like?

Virginia: It would be living on the top of a hill, with all of my needs met, and no one questioning what I am, or what I'm thinking, or what I'm doing. To me that would be a life without risk. And nothing to do, by the
way!

Bob: Can we conclude that risk is important to life because life is full of that? So, can we conclude that life naturally alludes to that, or leads to that, or it's a natural part of life because it's important?

Robert: I would suggest that we are hardwired to take risk. It is built into the very genetics that we have.  And while we may wish to avoid it at times, to avoid it, I would repeat, is to stagnate. It's built into us,
because without it there would have been no progression from life plasma orientation to now.

Daniel: Exactly. You have come to the core of the issue, Robert. Risk is not optional, it is inevitable. It is, of course, necessary for evolution to occur. It is also, as you have all implied if not stated directly, impossible to avoid.

The only thing that could be thought of as the opposite of risk would be death, mortal death. The fewer risks that you take the more restricted your life is. Consider the plight of the person with agoraphobia who is unable or unwilling to walk out of their home, even to cross the street, who lives as a virtual prisoner of the walls of their very house. And that is a physical risk. And as Virginia has noted, and Robert, and others, without emotional risks you cannot have relationships. You are not available if you're behind the safety of your defense mechanisms.

I would now like to add one more dimension to this process of thinking, and this is to ask the question, what really is there to be afraid of in the final analysis? What truly is so fearful that it makes it difficult for a
person to challenge it and take the risk? Again, my friends, your wonderful minds are appreciated. Give this a moment and let's talk about it.

Steve: I've taken some pretty good risks by the terminology of what Virginia was saying, and what I've had happen in my life so far. And to follow up on the first part. I wouldn't have enjoyed the life I've had so far without the risks. But to get into the answer now, after going through the risk a few times, it's real easy to say that the pain, the sorrow, the self-doubting, the self-destroying, the lack of self-confidence, all of it comes into play that puts you right down into the bottom of the hole which you don't want to come out of. I think that's what scares most of us. After being right at the bottom I know it, real well. But I haven't learned to be smart enough not to stay there, and I keep coming back and trying. The risk is still there, I've still got to try the risk because I can't live without the risk. I need to have that risk in my life, or I'm lost. It's real easy to say, no, I don't want to because of the hurt that I've been through so far as I risk. And it gets real scary
for me.

Daniel: You have stated well that the fear that is greatest for you is the loss of the love of another person, as well as the loss of self-respect and self-confidence. 

Robert: I would speak to another aspect of what is there to be afraid of after all, in risk. Conservatively, what will risk cause me? There is, as well as being hardwired, being genetically implanted into the organism the
necessity of risk, the conservatism of survival, whether it be physical or emotional. So with each risk the organism must decide whether or not there's a possibility of ceasing to function on some level. I see that as
just as basic as the necessity of risk. There's a balancing act. One that, by inheritance and by training, each of us must choose for any given situation. Negative experiences are very powerful, much, much more powerful than positive experiences within our species. I don't know the origin of this or whether it is consistent on other spheres, but it seems to be true on this one. So there's that balancing act involved. Yes, there's going to be risk because without it there may not be survival. But what will that risk cost me emotionally or physically or mentally or spiritually?

Bob: I think for me what Robert is saying comes down to a fear of losing position, status in somebody else's eyes. I don't know if this belonging is a need or whatever it is, but I seem to need to hold a position of importance, esteem, status in other people's eyes, and I fear losing that; and that keeps me bottled up.

Angie: Well, I don't know who it was who said, 'there's nothing to fear but fear itself.'  I certainly am not afraid of dying, but I think living is very fearful.

Daniel: Could you elaborate a little more on what aspects of living are fearful?

Angie: It's just everything that happens. It's just scary.

Gwen: Risk for me has two opposite ends. Risk in the physical world is not a problem for me. I love, I enjoy risky activities, climbing the Grand Teton, skiing 40 degree slopes on my Telemark skies; I live for that. It's
good. Challenging my physical ability is something that I enjoy. However, at the opposite end of the spectrum, at the emotional level, I'm very afraid of risk, mostly because of my disappointment and loss of trust in many different human beings. And, therefore, I'm so much more cautious now and more so as I get older, to take the risk. Recently, in my new relationship I can honestly say that if he were to break up with me tomorrow, if we're not together, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest because I haven't allowed myself the risk, because I'm too afraid of my long, long train of unhealthy relationships with people, just getting involved emotionally with unhealthy relationships. So risk to me is two opposite things. I'm not too sure
which one you were asking. But that's my answer.

Daniel: Excellent, Gwen, I was not asking for only one definition, obviously. You have given exactly what you feel, and stated it very well. It enters this stew of consideration with appropriate flavor. Now, my question was, what for you is the bottom line, what are you most afraid of, that is hardest to take a risk for? And so this answer will vary according to each of you. Are there other contributions?"

Barbara: The only thing that I was thinking of is that we are also hardwired to be social, and need other human beings. And, therefore, anything that threatens that connection is very fearful. And fear of the
unknown, people certainly remain in situations that are not healthy because they are afraid to take the risk, they don't know what lies beyond. Fear of abandonment, fear of rejection, all of those are fears that get put in the forefront when you think about the hardwiring for social interaction. I guess that's .... well fear of failure. I think it comes down to fear of the unknown, that's the bottom line.

Virginia: Daniel, everything that people have said here tonight I can identify with and probably have experienced everything that has been said. How do we know when to be assertive, stand up for yourself and break relationships, whether they're with spouses, peers, or people that walk on your toes and impose
their physical body on you, or when you try to keep that relationship going for your sake and their sake so that healing can occur. I know I said that relationships are what our life is all about, but I think it's still very
difficult.

Daniel: Now my friends, I would like to have you consider some of the 'hard sayings' of our Master, as they're termed. He said, 'whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whosoever is willing to lose his life for My sake and the kingdom's, will gain it,' or words to that effect. He said, words to this effect, 'what if kingdoms fall, everything crashes and burns, what concern is this of a God-believing faith son and daughter?' What was he getting at?  Of course Jesus knew of spiritual reality, for he, as a Creator Son from Paradise, knew from his own experience the reality of the Trinity. For Him there was no uncertainty at all.  His difficult task was to try to convince us that this spiritual reality, unseen by our eyes, was really in existence.

The good news that Jesus announced was the reality that your lives, our lives, (for I include myself
here as a former mortal), take origin in two sources, one biological, the other spiritual. His great good news was that we're not merely children of our material parents, children of the earth, but we are sons and daughters of the very Creator of all that is; and because of this fact, if we choose this relationship of trust, obedience, and joy, the material fears will not ultimately destroy us. It is hard to bear in mind on a daily basis that there is this other reality, that we are truly immortal by our consent; and that there is possible a trust relationship in a Person who is unfailingly perfect, good, and caring. Actually, it is idolatry to trust fully, 100 percent, in another human being, including yourself, for only God merits that kind of faith and trust.  

I suggest to you that the most important risk you take in your lives is to believe this good news, and once you take that risk, you taste reality. You sense that you have not been conned; you know there's something real. You feel the presence and love of God. Some skeptics would come back with, 'That's all fine and dandy pie in the sky, but how does that help me deal with my daily problems? Does that just automatically cancel the risks of courtship, the risks of friendship, the survival needs for daily bread, a roof over my head, and so forth; what does all that have to do with my real life?' And the answer is, you must discover this individually.

However, I would also suggest that the one who has made the leap of faith to believe in their sonship and daughtership, and their grand universe parents, is not any less connected to the material reality than a skeptical brother or sister, but rather has that settled peace making it possible to deal with all the risks of life that have been elaborated in the material sense, and find that balance that was stated between surging ahead, taking risks, and drawing back cautiously to preserve some aspect of your life. 

Minearisa: The topic at hand is one of core importance. The bottomless pit, as described by Steven, seems very real. There is, however, that safety net of God's love which prevents us from plummeting downward.  As God extends a hand to you it is your responsibility to reach back and grasp that hand. And what is required in order to reach out is self-love, for without self-love you cannot fully accept the love of another, including God.  

It is this self-love, Virginia, that answers your question regarding when to sever relationships, for when people treat us with less love than they extend to themselves, that is the point at which severing the relationship is the healthiest alternative.  

Regarding risk, risk is a requirement of change, and change is the requirement of growth. If you think of a bubbling brook, what keeps it clear and pure is movement, constant change, for if the movement stops,
indeed it becomes, as Robert said, stagnant. People stagnate just as water can. When one refuses to accept risk as a corollary of growth, and therefore, life, the mental stagnation that sets in is much like an early death for that person. And one common way in which people stagnate is by making assumptions that are convenient, that allow one to avoid that which he knows in his/her heart to be, perhaps, not the easiest path, but the right path. The example that Isaac gave earlier is an excellent one, and one to take to heart.  

Aaron: My vote is for the wisdom of one of your great presidents, who did say in fact, 'We have nothing to fear but fear itself'. And I vote for this because it was the habit of our Master to say, 'fear not, fear not little
flock, you are taken care of, God knows your needs.' He takes care of the grass, the flowers, the birds, He surely will take care of you. Don't be anxious, because you can't, by being anxious, add a day to your life.  Your hairs are counted, and even if they are falling out, you are still valuable, even if your society prefers you in a wig or a hair piece. You see how superficial and unimportant in the eternal perspective are so many of your fears. When you take the risk of faith, that leap into the arms of the loving Parent, you will not be disappointed. Daniel has stated this already; the Urantia Book states it consistently; I add my testimony as well. So throw those heavy weights off your back, relax those stressed muscles of self-protection, loneliness, and abandonment and see this sparkling, gorgeous universe, fully cared for, administered, and all moving in the direction of perfection. Some day you will literally stand on the perfect worlds of Havona. You will be amazed at what you see. The life ahead of us is incredible.